Today I'd love to talk to you about a book that will change my life and probably yours. What? I know. It sounds a little weird when I say it like that but let me explain. I read "Women, food and desire" by Alexandra Jamieson in February this year, a month after it hit the shelves. I discovered it by accident, on Goodreads or on Amazon, I honestly don't remember. It was one of the first books I read on my (then) new Kindle Paperwhite 3G. I didn't even know Alexandra Jamieson even though she's quite famous for being a chef in Super Size Me. But however I found the book doesn't matter, I'm glad I did. I believe everything happens for a reason and I'm quite sure this was the universe giving me a push in the right direction, my direction. I said it will change my life because I'm not there yet. It's still a transformation in progress but from the very beginning till the last word this book hit home for me, starting with these powerful opening lines.
What do you want?
This is the million dollar question the book starts with. And it's this particular question that has been nagging me ever since. A little subconscious Alexandra Jamieson jumping up and down in my mind, trying to get my attention. When you answer this question truthfully - or try to, because it's not always that clear what you want - over time you will find yourself. You will reach the authentic you. So over the course of a few months I searched my mind and identified what I really want, what I believe is the authentic me.
· I want to feel good about myself and my body.
I don't want to be a supermodel, I don't want to be thin. I want to be healthy and feel good and energized. I want to be able to look into the mirror and think: I'm beautiful. I want to nourish myself like I would my child, with food that will actually give energy and keep me shining from the inside out.
· I want a job I love, a job that doesn't feel like work.
When I say job, I mean job. I'm not the career-woman-type. I'd love to spend my days doing something that I love, something that I'm passionate about. But at the end of the day I'd want to have time to spend with friends, family, and do other things I love (hobbies).
· I want to settle down with the one I love and be a mom.
I do admire the independent traveling and world-exploring women, but I'm just not one of them. I'm the "house, garden, kids" kind of person. A creative, hopefully fun and encouraging mom. I've actually dreamt about this since I was a little kid. It's not for tomorrow (no worries Ruben) but a few years from now, this is my dream.
These three things are want I want. And even though they're not very detailed, this is enough to get me going in the right direction. Because I admitted to myself that these things are my top priorities I am able to make choices that will help me get there. So what do you want? Answer this question as honestly as you can and I promise you, your life path will get much clearer.
Opinions of others
One of the things I learned from reading this book is that the opinions of others don't matter. I obviously knew that already, but it only got clearer to me how true this really is. Judgmental opinions can wear you down, supportive opinions can lift you up. But whatever the opinion is, good or bad, they actually do not matter. The only one you should be asking "how are you feeling about this life decision?" is you and only you.
In the light of the first item on my list (feeling good and being healthy) I've been debating a few years now to drastically change my food choices. There will be another time for me to share my full story with you but I can tell you now, my relationship with food is toxic. And in order to change that I'd love to try eating vegetarian, plant-based, even vegan. But I'm afraid. Afraid of what others will think. Afraid they'll judge me because I'm being trendy or stupid or unhealthy. Afraid they won't believe this is what I really want for myself, because I am the first person to order steak now. Afraid they won't understand my choices and I'll have to explain myself over and over again. Afraid of being different. But the opinions of others do not matter. If I feel like plant-based eating is what I want and need, then that's okay. And if a few months from now, I feel like it's not working for me and I want to make different choices, that's okay too.
What you want right now might not be what you want a year from now.
Don't be afraid to admit to yourself that you've changed, it's okay.
A book without taboos
The way Alexandra Jamieson describes "being yourself as a woman" in this book is really incredible. I think many different kinds of women will be able to relate, no matter your size, ethnicity or sexuality. It teaches and gives examples of how to embrace your cravings, make peace with food and reclaim your body (as it says on the front). What I really loved throughout this book is that it's not only about food. Yes, food is a big focus, but it's also about emotional health, sexual cravings and bigger life passions. I also love how there are no taboos in this book. She talks about her own life experiences very openly as if you were a friend sitting next to her. I loved this book so much after reading it on my Kindle that I instantly ordered a hard copy. This way I can reread a few pages from time to time when I need some encouragement to find my truest self.
Dare to desire the future but don't forget to love yourself now
The main message in this book is that we need to accept our deepest desires in order to become the person we're meant to be in the future, but that - no matter what shape we're in now - we must start loving ourselves today. This is such a powerful and loving message that I want to share it with all of you and hope it will resonate and make you feel good today.
In the pictures of this post I (secretly) shared a few parts of the book that I loved very much. All you need to do to read them is zoom in to 200% with your browser (ctrl +, or cmd +). Interested? Get "Women, Food, and Desire" by Alexandra Jamieson on Amazon now! If you do read this book or have already read it, let me know in the comment what you think!
